Saturday, March 28, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
Expressing Myself
I don't think I've ever been good at expressing myself about 60% of the time. Sometimes things just come out wrong or when I try to convey something, the meaning partially gets lost along the way. I haven't been good at it ever since I was little. I guess its also about worrying what another person thinks or whatever. I kind of started this blog as a way to get my feelings across that I otherwise couldn't in a normal day, but ha that epic fails too. Words are powerful, and communication is important. I'm still learning how to better communicate myself to the world I guess.
Val's Bday and Other Things
Woke up early today around 730 to go eat at IHOP with Deodor and Jennifer. We had an awesome time at IHOP. Jen dropped the bombshell that she was moving to the PI. I hanged out with her here and there and from the times we hanged out, Jen is an awesome person, and though are time spent was little, I'm going to miss her.
Afterward, we went to work out because we wouldn't have anymore time. Got home and showered, and then went to go get the Sans Rival cake for Val and met up with Joryl, then we met up with Val and went to Elephant Bar where we waited a good 30 min or so, but it didn't feel like that too me.
Eventually Lau, Mel, Charo, Mendoza, and Warren got there and we got our seats. It was cool and chill. Ate some Jumbalaya shits, and eventually put in 35 to the grand total even though my shit was at most 20$ including tip and what not. I didn't feel like asking anyone for the rest of that shit. I hate big bills lol.
Then we went to the park and took awesome ass pics for the day!! Due to me being lazy and resaving the pics to get some URLS i'll just post the link here...
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohmygulayxd/
Anyways, I wanted to go to the park and do a slow dance with Karen before she dropped the bomb on me, and I was hoping to do that today. I wanted it to be nice and even though its cheesy and everyone dislikes cheese, you wouldn't dislike it if you were in that moment, because then it would've been magical. It was supposed to be like oh man we never got that slow dance at prom can I have it now. And then we were supposed to slow dance and twirl around and shit. Haha I know I'm a loser, but damn it would've been awesome. Needless to say I didn't get that. I ain't mad though, so its a closed chapter of my life now.
Today was still good though. Heiwa and goodnight.
Afterward, we went to work out because we wouldn't have anymore time. Got home and showered, and then went to go get the Sans Rival cake for Val and met up with Joryl, then we met up with Val and went to Elephant Bar where we waited a good 30 min or so, but it didn't feel like that too me.
Eventually Lau, Mel, Charo, Mendoza, and Warren got there and we got our seats. It was cool and chill. Ate some Jumbalaya shits, and eventually put in 35 to the grand total even though my shit was at most 20$ including tip and what not. I didn't feel like asking anyone for the rest of that shit. I hate big bills lol.
Then we went to the park and took awesome ass pics for the day!! Due to me being lazy and resaving the pics to get some URLS i'll just post the link here...
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ohmygulayxd/
Anyways, I wanted to go to the park and do a slow dance with Karen before she dropped the bomb on me, and I was hoping to do that today. I wanted it to be nice and even though its cheesy and everyone dislikes cheese, you wouldn't dislike it if you were in that moment, because then it would've been magical. It was supposed to be like oh man we never got that slow dance at prom can I have it now. And then we were supposed to slow dance and twirl around and shit. Haha I know I'm a loser, but damn it would've been awesome. Needless to say I didn't get that. I ain't mad though, so its a closed chapter of my life now.
Today was still good though. Heiwa and goodnight.
Friday, March 20, 2009
See If I Can Grow
Today overall I guess was a good day, or rather mixed potato chips. I think I did good on my stats exam on probability, but then again I could have been wrong about everything on the exam, which would suck so fuckin hard!! If I don't at least get a B on this exam then, there's probably no hope for me in that class >.<>.< so whack!!
The mind is suck a sucky thing though, I don't even want to think about someone, but all of a sudden she comes screaming back into my head, and im like wtf!! Dammit bakit why lol, i guess old habits are hard to break or something oh well.
I don't know why but I feel like im in such a negative space right now.
But yeah hanging out with Patti and Nat today was aweome!! Thanx guys!!
Some songs I'm Feelin:
K'naan-Wavin' Flag
Miri Ben Ari feat scarface-Sunshine To The Rain
Jedi Mind Tricks-Razorblade Salvation
Jedi Mind Tricks- Black Winter Day
The mind is suck a sucky thing though, I don't even want to think about someone, but all of a sudden she comes screaming back into my head, and im like wtf!! Dammit bakit why lol, i guess old habits are hard to break or something oh well.
I don't know why but I feel like im in such a negative space right now.
But yeah hanging out with Patti and Nat today was aweome!! Thanx guys!!
Some songs I'm Feelin:
K'naan-Wavin' Flag
Miri Ben Ari feat scarface-Sunshine To The Rain
Jedi Mind Tricks-Razorblade Salvation
Jedi Mind Tricks- Black Winter Day
Thursday, March 19, 2009
shiiiet
FML right now lol. Stats is hard, and I need to get a B in that class darn it. *sigh* Waste of a blog. whatever.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Blind
i am blind to love
blind to compassion
blind to true friendship
blind to family
blind to the crying baby in the cereal aisle
blind to the soldier worried about war
blind to the future
and blind to you
I am not blind to the anger, resentment, and envy
that i fully embrace
blind to compassion
blind to true friendship
blind to family
blind to the crying baby in the cereal aisle
blind to the soldier worried about war
blind to the future
and blind to you
I am not blind to the anger, resentment, and envy
that i fully embrace
Just A Thought Or Two
Yeah so been having a couple of good days ^__^ I don't want to go into detail, so ya'll can go onto Emerson's blog for that.
Bro copped me some jeans for my bday today from the Hundred's, the Monaco pair. They're awesome!!! Salamat
Other than that our aim conversations will probably never have the same breath they used to. I guess that goes without saying. I don't really know why. That's just the way it is.
Anyways, goodnight.
Bro copped me some jeans for my bday today from the Hundred's, the Monaco pair. They're awesome!!! Salamat
Other than that our aim conversations will probably never have the same breath they used to. I guess that goes without saying. I don't really know why. That's just the way it is.
Anyways, goodnight.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Been A Long Time
Its been a minute since I've posted anything on this blog. I get lazy when i get to this website and when im about to write something, I'm life fuck it and then I go on to read Emerson's blog.
Anyways, so the news and whatnot for the past couple of weeks. Things were awesome until Karen broke up with me(we're still good friends though shit just didn't work out), and then my mom started cracking on me about that shit. It was not cool. I've been in a slump over the past couple of days, not about Karen, but about life I guess. I started focusing on how empty it kind of is, unless you stay true to some goals or find a purpose to go on. Since December I find I haven't really been focusing on anything, and I was really going through the whole sadness phase of friends leaving and what not, but then I realized hey that's what friends do, don't dwell on it, we have to move on. That's also been my whole philosophy for awhile, but I kind of lost sight of it for awhile, and I started putting happiness on a pedalstal, if that makes any sense at all. I talked to some people and asked what keeps them going, and I'm surprised to find that they're just as lost as I am.
On a lighter note I'll have 2,000$ stacked by the end of next week and start looking around for a car and whatnot. I think My limit is going to be like 13,000$ and I'll pay 300$ every month on it. I have to try and find a summer job though, if I'm going to keep up with payments like that, coupled with insurance and maintenance. I'm going to be broke, hahaha but it'll help me deal with the materialism issues I have, I don't need a lot of the things I want anyways, not to mention we're in recession so I have to tone a lot down.
Oh yeah i said i was going to take picture updates of my jeans, but I can't because I've lost my recharger chord and I have to go buy/find it. But there's some minor fading at the crotch area, nothing that's really big yet. I should take advantage of the big back pockets and put something in there, that will make an awesome fade look. Maybe a calculator??? We shall see.
Oh yeah went clubbing last night, and that's not my thing, maybe its because there was a bunch of white people or something, idk. After my bday I'm going to detox, and help my other friends do the same. I'm talking about Dale if you know the nigguh.
Thanx everyone for being here in my time of need, its good having friends like all of you when I look at life through my distorted eyes ^__^.
Anyways, so the news and whatnot for the past couple of weeks. Things were awesome until Karen broke up with me(we're still good friends though shit just didn't work out), and then my mom started cracking on me about that shit. It was not cool. I've been in a slump over the past couple of days, not about Karen, but about life I guess. I started focusing on how empty it kind of is, unless you stay true to some goals or find a purpose to go on. Since December I find I haven't really been focusing on anything, and I was really going through the whole sadness phase of friends leaving and what not, but then I realized hey that's what friends do, don't dwell on it, we have to move on. That's also been my whole philosophy for awhile, but I kind of lost sight of it for awhile, and I started putting happiness on a pedalstal, if that makes any sense at all. I talked to some people and asked what keeps them going, and I'm surprised to find that they're just as lost as I am.
On a lighter note I'll have 2,000$ stacked by the end of next week and start looking around for a car and whatnot. I think My limit is going to be like 13,000$ and I'll pay 300$ every month on it. I have to try and find a summer job though, if I'm going to keep up with payments like that, coupled with insurance and maintenance. I'm going to be broke, hahaha but it'll help me deal with the materialism issues I have, I don't need a lot of the things I want anyways, not to mention we're in recession so I have to tone a lot down.
Oh yeah i said i was going to take picture updates of my jeans, but I can't because I've lost my recharger chord and I have to go buy/find it. But there's some minor fading at the crotch area, nothing that's really big yet. I should take advantage of the big back pockets and put something in there, that will make an awesome fade look. Maybe a calculator??? We shall see.
Oh yeah went clubbing last night, and that's not my thing, maybe its because there was a bunch of white people or something, idk. After my bday I'm going to detox, and help my other friends do the same. I'm talking about Dale if you know the nigguh.
Thanx everyone for being here in my time of need, its good having friends like all of you when I look at life through my distorted eyes ^__^.
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